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[15 Mar 2006|07:09pm] |
thanks for all the help guys!
yall suck
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| Please read! |
[12 Mar 2006|10:56am] |
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i haven't updated in forever! nothing much has happened. i got my prom dress and i love it! i got it at lillie rubin...i'll post pics later. my last cat died. We think he got bit by a snake and was poisoned. When i found out friday i cried so much. i'm so happy franklin was over...he made me feel so much better about everything.
I love that boy so much. I just have been holding back lately and i'm pulling away. I'm scared of getting hurt. Both of us have changed and the changes scare me. I wish he treated me like he used to. Not that he treats me bad at all now... he's wonderful its just i wasn't scared to let loose with my heart. I get scared that he doesn't feel that same for me or as deep as i do. Or that he doesn't like being on the phone with me or actually wants to hang out with me. I used to be convinced of it and now im not. So i pull away to guard my heart. Please help me guys!!
Oh and i miss hanging out with all of yall. Please call me if you have room for me with yalls bunch! I love yall!
i'm going to the beach friday and looking for someone to go with me! hint hint
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[08 Jan 2006|05:21pm] |
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i am bored
...
and people talk without thinking
stupid poeople they are
yes stupid
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[05 Jan 2006|06:07pm] |
Life is so good to me!
i am in love with that boy!
like head over heels crazy mad in love!
he is so good to me
and it drives me crazy
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| MERRY CHRISTMAS |
[25 Dec 2005|02:06pm] |
i got:
- a Canon Powershot SD400
- an Avalanche jacket
- Trish McEvoy Blackberry and Vanilla Musk perfume
- a pair of Rainbow flip flops
- a printer/scanner for camera
- a photo album with pictures from band lastyear in it
- a calligraphy pen and ink
- a Woodstock dvd from my mom which totally and completely rocks!!
- David Bowie cd
- MAC brushes and little bag
- $50 gift certificate to Best Buy
- a hammock whick is AWSOME!!!
i had a great Christmas! i love my camera and the Woodstock dvd and the hammock!!
what did yall get
???
I gotta go pack because i leave for Sandestin in the morning! Comming home the 30th to get Franklin and going back to the beach and comming home the 3rd!
alyssa
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[20 Dec 2005|05:23pm] |
*PAST*
1* First grade teacher's name: Miss Beasley
2* Last word you said: see you later
3* Last song you sang: fire and rain
4* Last person you hugged: franklin
5* Last thing you laughed at: can't remember
6* Last time you said "I'm in love with you": today
7* Last time you cried: today
*PRESENT*
9* What color socks are you wearing: all nat-u-ral
10* What's under your bed: 11
11* What time did you wake up today: 6:56
12* Current taste: water
13* Current hair : down
14* Current clothes: jeans blue shirt and mtn hardware jacket
15* Current annoyance: myself
16* Current crush: franklin
17* Current desktop background: some windows thing
18* Current worry: what the hell im doing to us
19* Current hate: myself
20* Current favorite article of clothing: mtn hardware jacket
26* If you could play an instrument, what would it be: sax
27* Favorite color: purple or green
28* Do you believe in an afterlife: i beleive in heaven and hell
29* How tall are you: 5'1
30* favorite number: 5
31* Favorite person: franklin and anna
32* Favorite season: spring
33* One person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to: gabby
34* strongest person you know emotionally: sure as hell not me
*FUTURE*
35* Where do you want to go for college? U of A
36* What is your career going to be like: working with kids and/or councling
37* How many kids do you want: 2
38* girl or boys: 1 girl 1 boy
*HAVE YOU EVER...*
39* Said "I love you" and meant it? yes
40* Gotten in a fight with your dog/cat/bird/fish: no
41* Been to New York: yes
42* Been to Florida: yes
43* Been to California: no
44* Been to Hawaii: no
45* Been to Mexico: no
46* Been to China: no
48* Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day:no
52* Do you have a crush on someone: yep nick my bf
53* What book are you reading now? none
54* Worst feeling in the world: feeling like you are losing your closest friends
55* What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning? im not etting up now
56* How many rings before you answer: 2
57* Future daughter's name: Danni
58* Future son's name: haven't gotten that far yet
59* Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: no
60* If you could have any job you wanted: cvs
61* Wish you had: a camera...i miss mine
62* Future College plans: idk
63* Piercings? ears
64* Do you do drugs: definantly not
65* whats ur fav. movie: Forest Gump
66* What are you most scared of: wasps
67* What clothes do you sleep in? pj butts and t shirts
68* Who is the last person that called you: mom
69* Where do you want to get married: not sure
70* If you could change anything about yourself what would it be: getting emotional and making a big deal out of crap for no reason, being able to stand up for myself, showing people i care about more than anything that i love them to death
71*whats ur shirt say: nothing
72* Are you timely or always late: late
73* Do you have a job: no
74* Do you like being around people?: yes
75* Best feeling in the world?: that insane crazy feeling i get in my chest when i hold kiss touch see or just think of that boy
76* Are you for world peace: yes
77* Are you a health freak: no
78* Do you have a "type" of person you always go after: no
79* Do you want someone you don't have? nope!
80* Are you lonely right now? yes...
81* Ever afraid you'll never get married: nope
82* Do you want to get married: yes
*IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU...*
84* Cried: yes
85* Bought Something: lunch at taco bell
86* Gotten Sick: no
87* Sang: yes
88* Said I Love You: yes
89* Wanted To Tell Someone You Liked them: no
90* Met Someone?: no
91* Moved On: no
92* Talked To Someone: yes
93* Had A Serious Talk: sorta...and i hated it
94* Missed Someone: yes
95* Hugged Someone: yes
96* Yelled at Someone: yes
97* Dreamed About Someone You Can't Be with?: no
98* Hit someone: no
99* Have you ever been heartbroken: yes but not in the past 2 days
100* Do you like the way things are right now? no...not at all
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[20 Dec 2005|04:33pm] |
screw im not using this shit anymore
nobody posts anyways
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[20 Dec 2005|11:50am] |
why am i so unhappy
and why am i treating the one si love the most like shit
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[19 Dec 2005|04:16pm] |
11 days till franklin comes home (crosses fingers) and i get to pick him up for the beach
9 days till our 16 month anniversary
7 days till i leave for the beach
6 days till Christmas
3 days till franklin leaves for the Bahama's
2 days till my Aunt and Uncle come to visit
2 days till its the last time i get to be with franklin for 7 days
1.5 hours left of school
to sum it all up....
IM IN LOVE WITH FRANKLIN
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[13 Nov 2005|10:28pm] |
man oh man
i can't get that boy off my mind
i love him way too much
it's for definante
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[02 Nov 2005|08:06pm] |
i just decided to go ahead and delete that last post considering i already insulted my boyfriend and one of my good friends without meaning to! so yea sorry to anyone!
went to church tonight. First time in close to 6 months. I missed it so much guys! It feels so great to be back! Its like a huge chunk of worries ahve been lifted from me. I donlt have to make the decisions and be down about making the wrong ones. There up to Him. Ahh i love it. To yall Christians who miss out on church and turn from God for a time span then come back...you know the feeling i'm talking about!!!
well likfe is close to being perfect! If i could jsut work this one minor detail out i would be so happy!
well im out
i love you alot mr
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[31 Oct 2005|06:34pm] |
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Hey guys,
wow things are so much better now! Thanks guys for the comments! It really meant a lot to me! You seriously have no idea how much better thins are now. I'm so much happier now, and i feel more myself and "we" are back to normal and a hwole lot better. I'm so glad your back mr. This tri did me and us a whole lot of good. It was a great bonding experience with everyone. Ah i loved it.
Anyways BOA was amazing. The band did very well considering it was there first time at a BOA competition. The bus rides were very interesting taking much longer than needed. I didn't mind one bit though. We had the best bus. Michael Lara Franklin caleb gabis and me began like a whole bus sing along to collide, i dont want to miss a thing, drops of jupiter and many more. Everyone was singing at the top of there lungs. It was so great. Kristen the bass drum dude/lady is so cool. She sat behind me and franklin and she was awsome. I'm very happy i got to know her alot better. Had a little bonding experience with mr kavli as well. He is seriously the coolest dad/guy you will ever meet. Anyways the trip was amazing. The "beach", the trip to the "beach", the mall, the competition, the super long bus rides, the chinese man, the pizza lady, the dogs, the three some and security, man it was great!!!
well i gotta go...halloweiners are coming!
alyssa
i love you more than anything mr!!!
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| please read...i know its long |
[28 Oct 2005|12:55am] |
God,
i dont know what exactly to say. i'm so confused right now. i can't stop crying. i cry every night now and i dont know why. i don't know who i am are what i wont or where im going or what i love or who my friends are or where they are. I miss me. More then anything i miss my friends. I have one best friend as of now and he's not even satisfying me. I miss my old friends so much. I miss anna, kirstan, marianna, scarlett, kimbo, jerikay, liam, lue, ashley, emily f and s, colleen, elizabeth, and so many more. I miss talking to them and spending time with them. They made me who i am and god i miss them so much. I can't have just one best friend anymore. I miss them and i miss you. I haven't talked to you in close to 5 months. I've been so scared. I've made so many mistakes and i hate it. I miss me. I don't know where i'm going. I have no purpose. I'm so confused. Everything that once made me happy doesnt anymore. It scares me bcuz they are so beautiful and i can't lose them. Help me God. I need you so badly right now. I;m sick of feeling like this and no one not even myself can make me feel better anymore. I need you. You are the most concrete thing i have. Please come back in and help me. I love you. And i miss what you do for me. Please God allow me to appreciate and love what used to make me happy. Help me remember who i am and begin living it out. Help me to find my old friends again and actually talk to them. I need them so badly right now. Lord let me start over and just feel new and refreshed. I miss what used to make me happy. Please allow me to feel the same again. I love you God.
-alyssa
please comment...
anna kirstan lue liam emily f emily s elizabeth scarlett marianna ashley colleen kimbo jerikay lara fur jenny gabis jew lindsay andrew casey skyler amy abby and franklin...yall mean the world to me. i miss you more than you can imagine. i apologize for anything i have done. i miss yall and i miss myself. i love yall more than anything in this world. and i mean that from the bottom of my heart!
i do love you mr
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[26 Oct 2005|05:29pm] |
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Fire and Rain |
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I'm ready for freakin effin friday!
for two reasons
BOA damnit and...and...
10 hours on a bus with the man/little boy i love most!
(oh and by the way friday is also our 1 year 2 months/14 month anniversury)
i hate being a girl sometimes
a select few of yall know why i'm saying this
grrrrrrrrrr
i love cell phones
they make me happy
i'm glad i realized whats been bothering me these past oh lets say 6 months
things are butt loads better
all smiles
i'm so freakin in love!
you have no idea
seriously
he doesn't even have an idea
but man oh man
he is the best thing that has and will ever happen to me
he makes me too happy sometimes
but i dont mind one bit
he's my best friend ever
kids my age...
try just try imagining the perfect best friend and being in love with him
pretty amazing thought
yea yea
well i found him!!!
and i'm not ever letting him go
no way no how!
later kids,
alyssa
i love my mr so very much!
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[20 Oct 2005|01:07pm] |
soooo
i've not been in the best mood lately! not mad or sad or angry or whatever just not happy. Like everything has been the same for so long and i just want a big change. I want osmething new and exciting to happen. I dont really know what im thinking or saying but yea. I just feel weird and not the same. Things that once made me happy are annoying sometimes and boring. And im not talking about anything or anyone. Just like life in general!
Well im trying to make plasn tonight. I mainly jsut wanna ride around and get food and talk and listen to music and hang out with people. Lastnight was great. Zauchin, Fur, Lara, Andrew, and franklin and i went over to Gabis's to watching movies then Chrissy came and picked Franklin up and Nick Took me home. Casey and gravy came over as well. It was lots of fun just talking and crap. I love yall!
I got my license today. Pretty exciting.
alyssa
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[15 Oct 2005|09:18am] |
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Happy Birthday my Nick Boyd!!!!!
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[09 Oct 2005|07:53pm] |
the spain park high school band kicks major ass
guard, majorettes, drum major, percussion, and band all 1's and best in class
guard, majorettes, drum major, and band had the highest overall score out of all the classes of the day!!!! pure domination!
boa, watch out hoes!!!!!!
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[09 Oct 2005|12:21pm] |
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i was really looking foward to today
but oh well things come up
theres always next sat.
i think
homework time
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[06 Oct 2005|07:24pm] |
i don't hate my life just if you're worried or what not
im not depressed or anything like that
im just so overwhelmed with school right now and not being able to see the mr
and so im tired as hell and i just want a break
thanks guys for the comments though
i love yall
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[05 Oct 2005|08:14pm] |
i am so overwhelmed right now and i can't stop crying
i wanna die
im not kidding guys
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